What I was looking for… September 9, 2020 By Bekki 2 Comments This content may contain affiliate links. One of the hardest lessons my kids have learned recently is the truth behind the verse, “It’s better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.” I wish I could say I never argue, but that’s not true. I became obsessed with everyone else’s opinion– but my husband’s. I searched the internet and friends’ social media feeds until I became blue in the face and unbearable at home. I dug deep, argued, walked away, and pouted. Just a few days ago, I realized my issue had nothing to do with the subject I was fixated on, but about my inability to communicate clearly. …and my thirst to prove I was right rather than listen. ((Sigh)) I hate it when my own bad behavior becomes the “kids, this is what NOT to do” lesson. If you’re on any news/social media sites at all, I’m confident you can make a good guess about which health related subject I have been wrestling with. At the heart of my personal communication crisis was a desire to hear both sides. The good and the bad from both perspectives. And I drove myself to the edge of insanity and back trying to find it.Critical thinking is an incredibly important tool to pass on to our kids. Free for subscribers How can you, how can I, how can WE teach our kids to objectively look at both sides of an issue or argument and then make informed decisions? Our world needs OUR KIDS to grow up with this skill mastered. How? Practice often.Remember debate classes? Teach kids how to be devil’s advocate (defending the side they vehemently oppose)/ Drop any issue on the table and take the time to peel back ALL sides.Form pros and cons for EACH side of the argument.Peel away emotionally charged language and blame.Talk through each side of the issue. The older your kids are, the more urgent this skill becomes. Today, the world is clearly divided about everything. We need to teach our kids how to be objective, loving, and clear about choice they make.And that comes from the seat of compassion and a determination to look at both sides long enough to see the truth.In my instance, once I turned off all the “noise” inside my head I could hear my husband clearly.It’s almost comical.But the moment I tossed aside propaganda, I found what I was looking for all along.XOXOBekki PS- Here are some starter topics to get you rolling: Should we have a pet?Should kids rule one day a week?Can we put one person in charge of toilet paper changing? Older kids Should the age for earning a driver’s license be raised?Books or movies: which is better for education?Should we ban cell phones for kids under 18? Controversial Should we mandate vaccination?What should be done about abortion? My struggle was over the propaganda charged mandates for everyone to get vaccinated. I wanted to find the prevention and treatment plans that are working around the world in order to weigh BOTH sides of this heartbreaking condition. I will not talk about vaccine vs no vaccines, but rather share a bullet list of what we’ve done in our home. We looked at both sides.We found treatment plans that are peer reviewed and have solid randomized clinical trials.These plans are updated weekly as new data and research comes to light.We printed the plan and took it to our doctor and openly discussed all stages of the potential disease.We determined we were on the same page as a family as our doctor.We built a wellness kit based on the research and our discussion with our doctor. Disclosure: I am not a doctor or medical professional in ANY way. I am a woman, wife, mom who feels responsible for the health and well being of her family and has spent hours and hours and hours digging through garbage to find a complete plan for her family which includes having our own: Prevention planEarly treatment planAdvanced treatment planVaccination decision that works for our family Boy, if you’re looking for a deep dive study with older kids, this is intense! I’d love to hear how YOU approach controversial topics in your home.