Raising a Son to be a Man is Scary for Mom Letting dad take the reigns, can be a bit unnerving for me. But it’s a beautiful thing… Boys are a different breed of animal than girls. The world can try to convince us to raise boys and girls the same way, but why? Boys and girls are beautifully and wonderfully made and so different from one another. I’m thankful for my manly man that takes raising sons to be men seriously. If it was left up to me, they’d never risk life and limb to have a good time. Not my husband. He introduces the boys to fun, adventurous and dangerous things all the time. The boys LOVE it. I’m confident that a boys dictionary would define dangerous differently than girls. I can’t even watch my kids ride their bikes without getting that roller coaster feeling in my tummy. A girl’s dictionary wouldn’t contain different kinds of mud either. Just sayin’. My husband has exposed and infected our sons with something called Hero Dirt. (yes, it’s a real thing) Just the name itself causes each and every one of my sons perk up like a dog who believes you just said the word, “walk”. … Read More »
Teenagers: Secure Their Parachutes By the time our kids reach high school, we can bend to the pressure to “let them go” and “cut the cords”.Teenagers need the help, guidance, and strength of their parents even more than toddlers do at times. The transition from middle schooler to adulthood is like running a medieval gauntlet. While some kids skate through their adolescence unscathed, many need extra care and attention. Unfortunately we do not get to pick and and choose which kids need extra help, and which ones do not. As parents we need to “go the distance” with each and every child and teen. Our job does not slow down when our kids hit high school, actually this is when the real “fun” begins. Truth’s About Parenting and Teaching Teens This is not the time to loosen the reigns. Honestly, adolescence is the time when kids really buck against authority, but should not be the time we let go. With the crazy flooding of hormones, teen brains can really struggle with rational thought and emotion. They need us desperately. Letting them make their own mistakes in their own educational journey should not mean we “Let Them Utterly Fail”. While we cannot complete their homework assignments for them, we need to stay on top of our teens. Some students flourish during this time and become “Captain of their Own Destinies”- even conquering the world. But, many students put on a realistic smoke screen that implies that they have the world by the tail, but are drowning in the amount of responsibility and work required in their life. By the time parents become aware of the fact that their students are struggling, they are facing a mountain of makeup work. Not fun on any continent. What does this mean? We stay on top of our kids. Continue to monitor their eating and sleeping habits. Maintain (or regain) parental control over things like tv and screen time so that we help them learn to manage these time-vacuum activities. While each family establishes what is acceptable to them, parents should be in control. Many teens need us to be firm over these things so they can safely flourish. Not doing acceptably in school should dictate less “fun time” with technology, social media, and texting. Be willing to go the distance WITH our kids. They are struggling in math? Either tutor them or find them one. Sit at the table while they finish their assignments. Model what it looks like to be confused, but to press through confusion to comprehension. There are adults who are willing to sit and mentor/coach not only our kids, but us parents as well. If you do not understand an assignment, concept, or assignment reach out and find help. Even You tube can be a great resource! Some kids will be easy to guide, others will be challenging, but all of our kids need us. They need to know that they are not stranded on a deserted island, abandoned to figure out how to create a flowchart demonstrating how to name a chemical formula from its scientific name, write an expository essay, or solve a quadratic equation alone. There is a whole team of adults, teachers, and mentors ready to help them, but first they need us. Do not be intimidated by the amount or subject of material they need to assimilate. Let them see you confused. Let them see you research solutions. Let them see you ask for help. Let them protest as you take them to a tutor. Just do not give up and let go. God gave us the responsibility to secure their parachutes, no matter how loudly they protest! Preview of the Heart of Homeschooling God’s Way Master Class. We need to STOP measuring success by grades, achievements, awards, and worksheets.
From 8th Grader to Man: Homeschooling through High School Son #3 is currently wrapping up 8th grade. That’s right, high school is just around the summer corner. It is time to make “the list”. What list? The “Everything I want to teach you before you graduate from High School” list. … Read More »
Sucking as a Parent in Today’s World We suck as parents today. In general parents today let their kids float. Through life. Through school. Through everything.I suck at that. My kids don’t float. They work. Things We Fail at in Parenting. Letting boys be boys.I have five of them. Trust me, they do not need help being boys. They need help being future men. We are training up the future men of this world, and we take that seriously. Our boys are clean, clean cut, and hard working… Whether they like it or not.Letting boys sit around all day.My “Mommy Sense” (similar to Spider-Man’s ‘Spidey Sense’) kicks into overdrive when I see my boys sitting on the sofa during the day. I immediately start asking, did you do this, did you do that?Sorry. Boys should not sit unless they are on the toilet.Letting my boys have their own style of dress and hair.Future men worthy of serving God, loving their wives, running their businesses, etc should be others centered. If they grow their hair to their tush, drop their pants to reveal undies, and pierce anything they can, then they will cause “grandma” to feel uncomfortable and cross the street to avoid contact with them. Not acceptable. While I’m all for freedom of expression, my boys express themselves in a boring way physically and that will give them an edge. Expecting teenage years to be Easy.We expect the teenage years to be hard because we will make them hard. Hard to disrespect us,. Hard to disobey the house rules Hard to live in our house and break our rules, hard to break things like curfews, Hard to be a glutton. Yep. Teenage Years will be hard. Moms and dads, if you have boys join us at sucking to raise them to be wimpy, lazy, self centered men. If you have little girls, suck at raising them to be focused on selfies, self, make-up, and sexuality. We need to suck at parenting “today” and excel at parenting for tomorrow. ********************************************************************* Preview of the Heart of Homeschooling God’s Way Master Class. We need to STOP measuring success by grades, achievements, awards, and worksheets.