Homeschool Wisdom from 26 Years in the Future.

Wow Mama,

We’ve learned so much about who we are as wives, moms, and homeschoolers over the last 26 years.

I found a magical time machine that allows me to communicate with you while your hair is still dark brown and your weight still matches what your driver’s license says.

I know you are looking forward to the future when the kids will read, write, and solve crazy mathematical problems… And they will.

I know you can’t wait to see them ride bikes, drive cars, and get their first jobs… And they will.

I know you hope to be able to compete with traditional schools and educate your kids in a way that truly prepares them for life and success… and you will.

But can I whisper in your ear? Will you listen?

Can I speak truths to you that have the power to transform that dreamy future into one filled with more peace, joy, and laughter than the one we experience today?

Your kids will absolute read, write, solve equations, recall important historical facts, and understand the vastness of the Lord’s creation in due season… but we learned something very important along the way.

We can’t go back...

You are living in the “back” right now.

You have the entire future at your door and you have the ability to pause and get a few things right that will change things for tomorrow.

Bekki, focus on hugging, cuddling, and enjoying your kids while they are cuddle-able.

Tickle, dance, sing, and embrace them every single day. 

Long before you try to get them to hold a pencil properly, fill their hands with mud, sand, sticks, leaves, play-doe, bread dough, pretzel dough, goo, pipe-cleaners, Legos, felt, ribbons, water, snow, ice, jello, pom-poms, beads and every other texture you can find.

Long before you try to explain “i before e except after c” or “watch me solve the quadratic equation”… …fill their hearts with love, joy, confidence, grit, patience, kindness, and self control.

Long before you drive yourself ragged totting them all over for various functions, sports, and activities train them to be a team player at home, picking up after themselves, helping with family chores and being content with less… much less.

Long before you tell them to play outside for a while, fill their imaginations with stories about fairies, knights, dragons, heroes, and space.

Before you fill their shelves with toys and their console with new games…
Explore, adventure, and discover everything the Lord’s playground has laid at your backdoor.

Rivers, streams, meadows, mountains, prairies, beaches, bushes, hedges, grass, paths, trails, snow banks, river banks, and all things glorious. Those are the wonders of childhood.

Look around with wonder and talk about it all with your kids, but more importantly… LISTEN.

What do they see, what do they hear, what do they feel, smell, and taste?

Become an expert at asking open ended questions and then waiting for your kids to answer. Count to 100 after you ask them something as you wait for their brain to process and answer you. It’s worth the wait.

Teach your kids the beauty of teamwork and make them wait. Often.

Begin practicing the art of sitting still now, even if for only a few seconds at a time and build in those kids the ability to be patient.

Make sure you say the word no, but practice saying yes too. Mommy can you play with me? dance with me? sing with me? build with me? read to me?     “YES”

Include your children in everything you do: shopping, cleaning, folding, driving, calling, testing, checking, planting, resting, reading, washing, ironing, building, fixing… and talk about what you’re doing as they enjoy your company.

And be sure to enjoy theirs…

Compliment your kids for cleaning up when they are done playing, sharing their favorite toys, or not giving up when things get tough.

Admire your children out loud when they show love, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, and self-control.

Every single day: laugh, love, work, rest and read.

You have so much time in front of you to “teach your kids” their ABCs and 123s. Be careful that you don’t skip over the love-bug cuddles and wide eyed wonder filled moments because you’re in a hurry.
Slow down.

Of course you want to begin “teaching your kids” right from the beginning. You already are. By focusing on their hearts, attitudes, and character today, you are setting them up for a life filled with success tomorrow.

Do not neglect your husband as you focus on your babies.

You are first his bride, then their mom. The BEST thing you can do for your kids is to love their daddy. Listen to his vision for your growing family and follow him with a smile.

Bekki, let me give you a glimpse of your future.

All of your kids read and are excellent writers and communicators. They excel at anything they put their mind to and are a delight to be around. I don’t think I need to tell you which is more precious.

You kept the Lord as the center focus, honored their daddy, and homeschooled them first in character, then academics. Oh, there were doubts.

They all read late, talked late and seemed to be behind their peers academically… Until they weren’t.

There was a moment in their lives that they catapulted right over  the kids in their age group because their character launched them much further ahead.

Actually it gave them an unfair advantage.

In your future you will look back and see you loved and overprotected your kids a bit. You carefully selected the activities and people they participated with and kept their lives “boring”.

You had them play outside everyday and made sure they worked as a part of a team.

Today you have three in college, one in high school and one getting ready to enter high school…. and you couldn’t be more excited.

To my younger self, don’t worry about “education” just yet.

Simply let the kids play as you work side by side and be sure to read aloud every single day. (Yes, audio books count!)

At some point you’ll be tempted to get them to hold a pencil. Resist the urge for as long as possible. Can it be practiced with clay, paint, mud, sticks, or sidewalk chalk? Use those first.

At some point you’ll be tempted to find curriculum. Resist the urge for as long as possible. Trust your gut.

Remember your goals…

• Include the Lord in all teachings. Bible before everything.
• Teach the kids their math facts so they know the basics by the time they graduate high school (add, subtract, multiplication, division, fractions, decimals, percentages, time, money, and measuring…)
• Focus on the art of communication, in both written and oral form. The kids need to learn to communicate clearly by the time they graduate.
• Marinate them in literature. Poems, comics, stories, historical fiction, non-fiction, classics and even creative packaging on things around the house.

Bekki, oh my younger more ambitious self… remember what you learned from your youngest, most delayed reader.

Your son didn’t read until he was ten and yet he suddenly burst into the one with the highest reading comprehension and most creative writing ability simply because we was steeped in story his entire childhood. Words watered his soul and he spent no time struggling to decode the language… he just absorbed it.

Oh, I’m not telling you to avoid teaching, I’m encouraging you to simply enjoy your kids and read a lot and reminding you that it will be an unfair advantage for them down the road.

Trust me. You have plenty of time!

xoxo
Your older grayer self,

Bekki

PS- The Lord really did know what He was doing, by saving your youngest for last. You needed all hands on deck to watch that one. 🙂