We have always believed in the philosophy that children are a welcomed addition to our family.

We love, eat, live, play and WORK together as a family unit.

We also make messes faster than the chicken can cross the road to prove to the opossum it can be done.

Related: Age-Appropriate Chores List {freebie} 

Even though our boys are now teens (or older), they still have an unbelievable ability to create chaos and disorder.

To combat the life-threatening danger of being buried alive by dirty laundry, we divide and conquer our home.

Translation– The boys do chores.

While chores can be controversial, we have found that our kids love it when they work together for the good of the team.

Son: “You’re such a cool mom!’

Me: “Why, thank you!”

Son: “Can I turn something on?”

Me. Grin widens like the grinch.
“Of course!
You may turn on the:

• dishwasher
• washing machine
• vacuum
• and shower!

Thank you for asking first, son!
When you’re done with those come ask me again, ok?”

Older brother begins laughing in the background.
“You walked into that one little brother!”

Son: “I thought you were a COOL mom!!”

ME: Oh, I promise I am.
Let me ask a few thousand moms on Facebook if they agree…

Well?
Am I a cool mom?
Are you a cool mom, too?

Need a plan to become a cool mom, admired by the rest of the cool mom club?

Benefits of assigning age-appropriate chores to children: by the Flander’s Family

• Chores “give children a sense of belonging, a sense of ownership in the world.”
• Chores “teach responsibility and independence.”
• Chores “enable kids to meet the challenges they’ll face through life.”
• Chores help “develop self-esteem and prepare children for the future. It takes a lot of training to become a competent adult. When are they supposed to learn this?”
• Chores “teach teamwork.”
• Chores teach children “how to manage their time and be accountable for themselves.”
• Chores give children “the joy of doing a good job and of helping others. Children who know they are helpful to those they love are ones who understand that they can make the world a better place.”
• Chores combat “laziness, self-centeredness,” and “feelings of entitlement.”
• Chores “turn children into good, productive, hard-working citizens.”
• Chores make kids “feel important in the family structure.”
• Chores give kids an opportunity to “learn through participation. Children gain confidence by mastering new skills, especially skills they perceive as ‘grown-up.’”
• Chores give children “hands-on job training for life!”
• Chores serve to “instill a strong work ethic. Children are more capable than a lot of people think.”
• Chores show children “they can be competent and can do tasks well. We should teach them that while they’re young — they won’t magically learn it when they grow up.”

Setting up chores can be overwhelming.

I personally needed help. I couldn’t figure out where to begin.

• How many chores are acceptable?
• What kinds of chores?
• Should the kids do EVERYTHING?

Photo by Catt Liu

So I met with a friend.

I chose her because her children were at my home recently.

We were all enjoying our breakfast when her boys (12 and 14) began discussing their chores. They compared their “lists” and then began deciding what they should do afterward.

What struck me was their heart.

They even planned on doing the next day’s chores as well, “To surprise mom”.

I chose this mom because her kids had hearts of unity, cheerfulness, and selflessness. That doesn’t magically happen. This was evidence of expert parental training.

I loved what I saw in her kids, so I cheated!

I invited her over, served her coffee and asked, listened, and then quickly duplicated what she did in her home.

It took a few weeks to tweak her system to fit our family, but at least I was beginning with a proven system.

Beginning with a Proven System

First I spent a few hours on the computer mentally picking each and every room apart.

What were all of the necessary tasks that were required to ensure that the room was clean, really clean?

I did this for all of the spaces in our home:

• bedrooms
• bathrooms
• dining room
• entry & living room
• hallways
• kitchen (that is my idea of a dream kitchen above)
• school area
• laundry room
• garage
• pet area
• outside.

(Printable) Get your free chore Idea list 

Then I broke the “tasks” into chores that would take between 2-60 minutes to complete.

I made a spreadsheet that had my boys names and each day of the week and began “assigning chores”.

Most of the days have about 6 chores and will take between 40-90 minutes to complete depending on the age of the child. I found a magnetic chore chart and planner that neatly applies to the refrigerator to make it super convenient.

In our home, the refrigerator is one place I can GUARANTEE that my “starving” boys will visit multiple times a day. So I put the chart there:).

Almost done.

We scheduled a family meeting.

We talked through all the chores, new standards, etc.  We spent the next two weeks “modeling” how each chore is to be completed properly.

This is the most important step.

Kids need to be trained, actually over-trained.

Focus on how to do a task and the practice the right attitude until they are doing a great job.

Related: 10 Chores you might be doing wrong

The magnetic chore charts have a “we take our part of the team seriously” feel to them.

I have even recently discovered that they can be modified for other purposes: grocery lists, good foods list (we have a recently diagnosed diabetic in our family), or even to do lists.

Chores and organization are very personal.

Every family is different, and frankly so is each new season of life. My pro tip for the day is to find a friend that has a well oiled daily routine and invite her over for coffee.

She may hold the keys that will unlock order and peace in your home!

“Keep in mind that a child who has mastered a complicated computer game can easily run the dishwasher,” Elizabeth Pantley

Chore Systems that Work for Other Families

Chore Magnets for Older Kids–>https://amzn.to/2pm0C6n

“These are super cute & perfect for my family command center.”

Zone Cleaning for Kids Clean ‘n’ Flip–>https://amzn.to/403rSWa

• A fully-laminated flip chart, allowing for all sections to be checked with a dry-erase marker and/or customized by Mom or Dad with a wet-erase marker.
• Instructional DVD that walks children through the process, demonstrating the correct way to complete each task. The DVD also gives parents tips on how to best utilize the program.

Creative QT Chore Sticks – Make It A Game–>https://amzn.to/2Denj6a

Chore Sticks were designed with games in mind. The surprise each time as to what they will be helping with, along with collaboration and competition, make using these prompts more exciting than simply following through on their daily tasks.

Chore examples include:

~clean kitchen counter, organize books and games, wipe down door knobs and light switches, dust the living room, and many more.

Fun, surprise sticks include:

~dance to one song, go read one book, go hug mom or dad, do 15 jumping jacks, and several more.

Chore Chart for Kids–>https://amzn.to/2xynjrp

When all else fails, get creative!

I want to hear from you!

What do you think?

Did you do chores growing up?

Do your children do chores?